There is the perception in modern western astrology that romantic and marriage success depends on really super synastry between the two individuals or perhaps a wonderful composite of the two charts. There is no doubt that good synastry is very useful since it does rule sexual attraction. Without it, a relationship would be cold and lifeless. We have all been introduced to or met someone and suddenly there was this enormous attraction! That is synastry in action. It works on the planetary aspects between the charts, especially the conjunctions. Synastry merely needs to be reasonable; it does not have to be perfect for a relationship to succeed. As long as you have easy aspects between the Ascendant, Sun and Moon of the two partners then good timing will take care of the rest. If both partners have the Moon in the same sign this is especially helpful since it allows easy communication and sharing of feelings.
Birth Time of Relationships
Astrology depends heavily on exact timing; otherwise there would be no point in having an exact birth time or in doing chart rectification. Yet there is strong resistance amongst western astrologers to apply this effective tool to relationships. To have a good relationship you not only need good synastry with its attraction, you also need a good birth time for the relationship. This is after all the natal chart of the relationship; once you start it you can never go back and redo it. Like the natal chart of a living human being, once the child is born there is no way to ever change its chart. The only thing that trumps a First Date Chart is a marriage chart which is a legal contract. In order to ensure a good relationship you need to elect or choose a time for the first date that will strongly encourage the attraction and allow the partners to enjoy each other’s company. In North America, 60% of marriages end in divorce, therefore having a good marriage chart would be incredibly helpful. It is not helpful to use the modern planets Uranus, Neptune and Pluto as rulers of signs. Rather, use them like the fixed stars, keeping in mind their own special qualities but not using them for rulerships of signs.
Internet and virtual dating are part of modern 21st century society, and some dating websites claim they now facilitate 90 marriages per day. For couples who meet on Internet dating websites, first dates or first meetings that encourage relationship success can be very conveniently arranged. People who meet on the Internet generally chat for a few weeks before they physically meet for coffee or dinner. Astrologically, I define the first date as the time two people meet face to face with acknowledged romantic intent. If you meet someone at a social gathering and arrange to meet them at a later date then be sure you follow the astrological rules. An unexpected meeting is not a first date. If the other person is not willing to meet you at a time of your choosing then the relationship will not last very long anyway. You are better off giving it a miss. That is the conclusion I came to after dozens of dates with women I met on dating websites. In countries where the marriages are customarily arranged by the parents, the parents can consult an astrologer to choose a good time for that all important first meeting. This ensures that the first face to face meeting brings about mutual attraction and an enjoyment of each other’s company.
Factors for Good First Date
So what are the factors that are necessary to make a romance sizzle? The process is actually very simple; there are only two main rules that need to be followed. For romance you want the ruler of the 1st or coruler Moon in easy applying aspect to the ruler of the 5th. Separating aspects mean the relationship can never become closer and the partners will eventually separate. Romance, sex and children are issues ruled by the 5th house and the Moon rules the emotional intent of the moment. The Moon in aspect to Mars brings sexual desire and in aspect to Venus it brings love. To ensure that love and sexual attraction are generated, the Moon should be in easy applying aspect (conjunction, sextile, trine) to both Mars and Venus or at least to one of them. If the Moon makes an easy aspect to one of these planets but a hard aspect to the other then the romance will still work. It is the presence of the aspect that is important. Let a Mars or Venus ruled sign be on the cusp of the 5th house. These are the signs Aries, Scorpio, Taurus and Libra. As long as the Moon as coruler 1st applies by easy aspect to Mars or Venus, no matter which one of them rules the 5th, then a lasting attraction will develop and the partners will fall in love. Needless to say, if you show up for the first date dressed in rags and unwashed for a week then no astrology will bring you success!J Both partners should look their best according to the highest expectations of their culture.
Keep in mind that two planets are not in aspect unless the aspect perfects before the planets change signs. This change of signs is called a refranation because the person ruled by the planet making the change refrains from completing his intended action. The easiest way to prevent this problem is to choose a date where none of the inner planets are near the end of a sign. A date near the 20th of each month should be avoided because the Sun and the inner planets all change signs around that time. The planets are also not in aspect unless the aspect perfects without the intervening aspects to or from other planets. This is called a prohibition. The only other rule is that the last applying aspect of the Moon within an orb of thirteen degrees should be an easy one and never to Uranus.
Minor Rules for Success
If you want to gain expertise in romance then you should also look at the following 8 minor rules :-
- If you want to attract the person you have selected, then let the Moon be in Aries, Leo, Libra or Capricorn, because these signs have a lot of strength and power.
- An applying aspect of the Moon to the Sun is good because it indicates great choice in romantic partners.
- Make sure the Moon does not apply to any aspect to Saturn; otherwise the intended romantic partner will be too cold and critical and will decline the offer of romance.
- Also make sure that the Moon is not in Pisces, because this sign often indicates hidden health problems.
- Gemini, Libra or Aquarius should be considered, since they usually indicate good communication and great pleasure.
- But if the Moon is in any aspect to Jupiter, then the other person will refuse the offer of romance.
- Be aware that Venus in the 1st house in dignified in Libra or exalted in Pisces brings great joy.
- Saturn in the 7th brings discord between the two parties and failure to bond romantically.
Below is an example of a first date that does everything right.
Good Elected First Date
The chart above has Sagittarius rising, Jupiter ruler 1st is peregrine in Scorpio in the 11th house of friends. He is now an acquaintance but would like to be her lover, the 11th being her 5th of romance. Moon coruler 1st is in the 1st in Sagittarius in applying opposition to Venus ruler 11th and 6th and in applying trine to Mars ruler 5th of romance. They met on the internet and agreed to go for dinner, and this is the first time they met in person. This is not a marriage, so the 7th house ruled by Mercury does not enter consideration. The Moon makes an opposition to Venus and then a trine to Mars ruler 5th, so this meeting will definitely result in romance. By the time dinner was finished she was infatuated and they have been a couple ever since. The last aspect of the Moon is a conjunction to Pluto ruler 12th, so both parties had a lot of personal secrets that came out much later. They are now living together and are planning to get married.
People can meet and fall passionately in love just based on the synastry. However, if the first date chart does not allow for long-term success then the relationship usually fails. If either partner is only interested in a one night stand but unexpectedly falls in love, then unfortunately the first date can never be undone. Time flows only forward.
The chart has Taurus rising, Venus ruler 1st is in applying sextile to Mars ruler 7th. This chart was elected by the woman who thought of herself as an astrologer. Unfortunately, the aspect does not come true until after both planets change signs, so this is a refranation and will never work. The Moon applies to a trine of the Sun ruler 5th and they became intimate 20 minutes after meeting for the first date at his apartment. She called four days later to end the relationship because she said she didn’t want to get hurt; Moon square Node four degrees orb. She called again after Christmas to say she wanted to see him again; he went to see her, fell in love and moved in at the end of March; Node trines Pluto, three degree orb or three months time. They broke up in mid August after her sister came to visit and caused a big fight, Venus/Mars orb eight degree or eight months. Venus makes no aspect to Sun ruler 5th, so the end of the romance in the relationship is predictable. The Moon coruler 1st makes no aspect to Mars or Venus, but does make a trine to the Sun ruler 5th after trining Pluto coruler 7th. The Moon translates the light from Pluto to the Sun, but that is not enough to counter the refranation.
As the above article proves, the synastry between the two people is not a good indication of relationship success. The synastry in the unsuccessful example was actually much better than in the successful one, having lots of easy aspects between the charts. There is no doubt that while synastry is useful, the tool of timing so effective in natal astrology needs to be applied to romantic relationships. Synastry merely needs to be reasonable; it does not have to be perfect for a relationship to succeed. Timing is everything.